


Sure

by Ghost_droid



Category: Mr. Robot (TV)
Genre: Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Other, gender neutral reader, most characters listed mentioned not featured
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-07-13
Updated: 2016-09-21
Packaged: 2018-07-23 18:14:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7474665
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghost_droid/pseuds/Ghost_droid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>after the hack you disappear and Elliot must cope with your absence</p><p>(Quick pre season 2 one shot in hype of the premier tonight!)</p><p>season 1 spoilers and season 2 speculation present</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sure

Elliot Alderson/ Reader

  


Sometimes he wished he could go back, stop all of this from ever happening.

But that was a lie, he’d done what he’d always craved to do, he changed the world. Maybe it was for the worst, he felt more like he had wrecked it than saved it, but there was a thin line between the two, Elliot had to remember that.

But what made him crave for the past wasn’t exactly the lack of chaos or his old job, his old routine.

It was you.

After he deployed the hack he had an encounter with Tyrell wellick which ended with him waking up in his car and said man missing. You were Tyrell’s personal assistant, Elliot thought you’d be left behind but he found your apartment cleaned out, you hadn't left him even a small clue of where you could be.

It had been some time now, the world was still turned upside down from what he did and he was looking over his shoulder, paranoid of being found out.

Mr. Robot tried to soothe his nerves, seeing the apparition who took the form of his father only caused him more stress, he felt like he really had finally dived off the deep end.

_‘You're not crazy Ellie..”_

He felt comfort in remembering your voice, you’d always convince him he wasn't a whack job but you didn't really know the full extent of it did you?

He’d built this perfect maze to hide himself in, so he'd never be hurt, never truly be open, but you had been determined to find your way through your vines twining themselves around his walls.

It was a weird metaphor but it made sense while he was a maze you were the vined plant life that had grown on him over time. He wasn't sure how you could stay so determined for so long, loving him through the worst of times, but he was sure he’d reciprocate just as strongly if he could.

He wanted to be an open book with you, he wanted to do what normal couples did and whisper “I love you’s” in your ear without basically having a full on anxiety attack.

You always held him, told him you knew how he felt and that he didn't have to say it, but he wanted to so bad sometimes it hurt that he couldn't push the words out of his throat unless you were asleep or he was high. He tried to change for you, tried to be more comfortable with touch and force himself to go out to make you happy. But it did the opposite.

_“Elliot I don't want you to be someone else,I love everything about you, that includes your social issues.”_

It had surprised him, everyone wanted him to be someone else, they wanted the gold star for “fixing” him, like getting him to go to a party meant he was cured of the disease that was his personality. It seemed like they were always telling him it was just too hard to connect since he was like this.

_"It's just hard for me to talk to people..it's like I have connection issues so I'm kinda bad at telling if I can really just be me."_

He was trying to joke with you at his own expense but you just took his hand even as it retracted out of habit into his sleeve.

_"Well then I'm telling you, you can just be you when you're with me."_

that was when he realized he actually loved you, because you connected with him like it was the easiest thing that you could do.

 After the first few weeks of you being missing, he’d come to terms with it, all he could do was hope you’d come home soon.

Now he didn't live in the same home you two had once shared, you basically lived at his apartment so he could call that your home, but now he was isolated in his mother's old town house.

Away from computers he felt away from the world.

How would you know where to find him? How would he know where to find you? Or when you came back? These were amongst the many questions that kept him up at night.

  


He’d be in the kitchen at night sometimes, it was dark and grimy in real life, but sometimes he'd let his mind drift into daydreams. It would be so domestic you two living here, you’d love to redecorate this place, you'd make it cozy.

You'd put a little table near the window so you two could eat breakfast and watch the morning sun, you'd probably get some nice flowery curtains, you loved things like that.

_“This place could use a paint job, I could get swatches and we could really brighten everything up and…”_

He'd smile just imagining you scurrying around making what felt like a self inflicted prison into a small budget dream home filling it's cold interior with your natural warmth.

It was nights like that when he could basically hear your voice that made him crumble, he was alone more than ever so he'd let his frustrated tears fall freely.

He knew you two would never have the true perfect domestic dream couple life, he was him for god's sake, his mother wouldn't let you change a thing in her strict household. But he could dream.

 

You'd been gone months when he got it. His old building finally forwarded his mail and there it was.

He was confused when he saw the small blue envelope on his room table, but as soon as what he recognized as your handwriting graced the front he felt his heart skip and come to a complete halt.

His eyes were glued to it as he hurriedly tore it open, how long ago has this been sent?

_“Dear Elliot,_

_I know this is different from the tech you're used to but I can't risk leaving a record of myself just yet. I know I've been gone some time but don't worry._

_I can't tell you much, or really anything right now, but what I can tell you is that I love you and I'm trying to come home as soon as I can._

_Please be patient with me, you'll understand later._

_Lots of love, (Y/N)”_

Elliot wasn't sure if he should feel relieved or even more scared, it's been so brief but he cradled the letter to his chest. He hoped it would still hold even the smallest scent of you but it sadly smelt only of his old building and envelope glue. The letter was a few months old at least, most of the other mail that had come with it was, he cursed at his old building for receiving this so late.

He folded up the letter anyway and put it in his hoodie pocket for safekeeping.

 

_“You can't hide out here forever kiddo.”_

“Shut up.”

Elliot was walking aimlessly into the night trying to evade Mr Robot, flipper in tow. It was one of those nights where he just itched to move, it was 3 am so the world was mostly asleep and dark, that's how he liked it, no one could see him in the safety of his hoodie. He felt his fingers caressing the now weathered paper of the folded letter, he liked having a piece of you with him even if it was just your handwriting. He remembered how you used to love his hoodie and smooth the fabric of his sleeves when you were feeling affectionate, he tried to imagine the feeling as he turned the corner.

_“I think your hoodie is nice, it's like your trademark, gives you character.”_

While Elliot sulked in a memory, Flipper was happy to be out, Elliot felt guilt gnaw at him, he'd been a little neglectful to her as of late. His depression mixed with his stress was not a great combination, he craved morphine more than ever in these times.

He shook his head trying not to think of the drug, it only brought up memories of another who too was missing, but in a way she could not come back from.

 

It has been early on a Sunday morning when the ringing came, his focus was no longer on you as he tried to work through the morning, his mind more on stress, an upset Angela and a worried Darlene more than anything.

As he moved to the house phone you wormed your way into his thoughts as he caught a glimpse of the window.

Fat grey clouds, soon to release a storm, you always loved days like this.

He picked up the phone, he was going to give his usual curt answer to whatever telemarketer this was to take his mother off their call list when a more familiar voice came through.

_“Elliot?”_

He was frozen, was this another delusion? His mind was always playing tricks on him, how would you even know this number?-

_“Ellie please tell me you're there.”_

Your nickname for him broke through, but barely relieved his suspicion.

Usually that's how he could tell the difference from a delusion of you and reality, his brain always left out your pet names in its efforts to trick him.

_“(Y-Y/N), are you-?”_

_“Really there? Yes El, real as they come, even a brilliant mind like yours couldn't think me up.”_

He would've laughed if he wasn't so nervous, what did this call mean, what if it was tapped? He knew more people had their eyes on him, and he didn't know just how closely they were watching.

_“Elliot I went home and it had someone else in it, I felt so jarred. Did you move while I was away?”_

He gulped, he didn't want to stay on the phone much longer, he needed to see you right now.

_“(Y/N) I can't stay on here much longer, meet me at the subway station, near our old home.”_

_“Okay I-”_

He hung up and grabbed his hoodie and backpack, he needed to get to you, fast.

 

You looked much younger and more tired than he remembered. You had a backpack slung over your shoulder, a green army jacket on with some black jeans and an unmemorable t shirt. Your face was what really did it for him though, he walked faster his fingers burning with the memory and the need to caress your soft cheeks.

You didn't even have time to speak before he crashed his lips into yours.

He surprised you both, his mind raced with his actions, you wouldn't just come back so suddenly with nothing to tell him. But it could wait, his body ached to have you close.

His kiss was hungry and desperate, you returned the emotions with a fervor, he felt relieved that you missed him just as much as he missed you.

He never imagined he'd be with someone like this, having them this close without wanting to back away, as you laid your head in the crook of his neck it felt like the most natural thing he could have been doing with you.

“I never want to leave you like that again..”

“Where did you go?”

“I can't tell you right now, I want to but I can't just yet.”  

He sighed turning his face into you hair, he knew you meant it. You hiccuped small tears dripping as you gripped the back of his hoodie so tightly, liked you'd be pulled away again if you didn't hold onto him for dear life.

“I love you (Y/N)..”

He’d said it so quietly, but you heard it loud and clear, he felt the shift in your mood immediately.

He had so many questions of where you had been and what you had been doing, if you were back did that mean Tyrell was? Did you leave of your own free will? How did you find his new number? Why were you back?

But as he felt you sigh and your tense muscles relax against him he knew now wasn't the time, it was time to take you home.

 

He held your hand as you waited for the subway train, you smiled as he told you about the house. His mother definitely would have a problem, but these were issues he would leave for when he got to them. 

“I think you might like it..I mean it's not the apartment but..”

You squeezed his hands and kissed his cheek

“Elliot, that was home because it's where you were, as long as you're there, this place will be home too.”

There was still a lot of work to do to save the world, a lot of questions unanswered and a war on society unfinished. Elliot wasn't sure of what was to come in the future.

But as you leaned on his shoulder dozing sweetly next to him on the train, he knew he had one thing he was completely sure of.

He was never going to lose you again.


	2. Hard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You adjust to change and reflect on the past and Elliot continues his days on repeat

Elliot Alderson/ reader 

  
  


Your life had definitely changed over the course of a month. You went from doting significant other caught in the cool haze of a what was now becoming long term relationship, to almost a stranger. 

You'd never known the full extent of Elliot's hacking, you thought it was just a hobby, something you could turn a blind eye to, he was supposed to be the good guy. 

Was that what he was? The good guy? 

Was anyone in this situation? 

You'd never think he had it in him to spin you such an intricate web of lies,you thought you knew him better than anyone, but maybe that was just it. 

You didn't really know him at all. 

At least not that side of him, not Mr. Robot. 

 

You remembered the first time you saw him, he looked so closed up trying to look smaller to the rest of the world but he caught your eye immediately. Tan skin, wavy brown hair shaved at the sides, but what you were really a sucker for was his eyes. 

They held a small stray of anxiety, but it didn't mask the beauty of them, he was lucky having hazel eyes, they changed color at their own will. They were a grey blue the first time you walked over to his desk, your boss Tyrell wellick speaking to him but you were too smitten to catch what he was saying. 

_ “(Y/n)? Aren't you going to introduce yourself?”  _

You were pulled from your observance, you tried to will yourself not to blush as you stuck a smile on your face. 

_ “I'm sorry I was a little elsewhere, I'm (Y/n) (l/n) and it's really a pleasure to meet you mr..?”  _

He eyed you for a moment, his expression still neutral but you swore you saw a hint of wariness 

_ “Elliot..just Elliot.”  _

Maybe he just wasn't one for formalities.

 

Living with Elliot's mother was definitely not the worst thing that could've happened to you but it was definitely up there. 

She didn't like you, that was a given, she constantly complained to you anyway though about the neighbors and the women she spoke with at the supermarket, she was definitely a confusing woman. 

You were the only one working out of you and Elliot currently, she took a percentage of your paycheck as rent, honestly your old apartment cost less than what she took out, and all you got was a cot in Elliot's room and a box for the little clothes you still had. 

Your job was nothing as glamorous as when you were Tyrell’s personal assistant, that came with perks such as dining with him and his wife from time to time, attending meetings, yearly bonuses, it wasn't some high rolling job but it kept you comfortable. Now you were lucky if they would let you have an extra night shift at the crummy office in town. You would've went back to E corp but you knew what they did, who they were behind closed doors. Besides you'd likely immediately be under investigation, your old boss kinda killed someone, luckily you were on your vacation so another assistant was actually there for that big mess. But you also had tampered with their network, even if it was reluctantly at first. You’d once helped Elliot get a worm into their systems but that was a story for another time. 

 

It had been about a day since Elliot had stopped that hack on E corps servers, you hadn't been present for that meeting but Tyrell was definitely interested in Elliot and his abilities, you hoped it wasn't in a similar fashion to your interests because you were sure you wouldn't stand a chance. Of course Tyrell was married but you knew he definitely was not straight, he seemed more like he walked the line of bisexual but you didn't want to make assumptions, but you were more than a little aware of what he did for “business”. Strangely his wife was aware having her own separate partners, so you didn't let it drift in your mind too often. 

What did drift into your mind more and more now that he'd been brought up to you several times, was the cute tech that your boss was thinking of adding to the tech staff. 

Your cheeks bloomed with blush at the thought, seeing him everyday, what could that stir up? Something unprofessional that's for sure, but it would be so worth it for someone like-

_ “(Y/n) right?”  _

You basically jumped out of your skin when his voice broke the barrier of your quickly escalating daydream. When did he get here? Had Tyrell made a decision on hiring him? You felt worry creep it's way into your chest at his slightly rattled expression, his hands were shoved deep in his pockets and his hoodie was pulled up. 

_ “Yeah that's me! Ah..what brings you here Elliot?” _

_ “Well I was looking for the exit and I saw you.”  _

He didn't sound finished, he paused for a moment, like he wasn't sure what to say but didn't quite want to go just yet.

_ “Tyrell wants me to work here..” _

You felt excitement then, small and quiet but still excitement. 

_ “Well that's great, that could be a real career changer for you, you have a talent, at least that's what I've heard.”  _

He seemed to be uncomfortable with your praise, but he nodded and gave you a small smile anyway. 

_ “Yeah, do you like it? I mean..working here?” _

You smiled and nodded

_ “I mean, it's a job, but it's still a really nice one, Mr. Wellick is a very generous boss and the workplace is friendly, I'd consider it if I wasn't already here.”  _

He looked far away as his eyes ghosted over your desk, it was neat and tidy with only a few nic nacs here and there, you didn't have an office being an assistant and all but you liked your desk out here, it meant more socializing like right now. 

To be honest it was usually unwelcome, chit chat distracted you and slowed down your work, but with Elliot you felt comfortable, and you didn't know at the time but he later told you he felt the same way from that day on. 

  
  


Elliot was so set on this routine of his it was driving you nuts, but you had to let him continue, if it really made him feel in control you couldn't bring yourself to try and take that from him. 

Ever since you met Elliot you'd know about his depression but he'd only let you in on his delusions recently, you felt like he might also have a personality disorder. Mr. Robot was a recurring apparition of his he'd confided in you about, but you'd also met him once, at least that's what he told you. 

You saw him getting ready to go out past his self implicated curfew, he seemed different as he offered for you to tag along, you liked the idea of being alone together so of course you agreed. He was definitely acting different, he just seemed off with this weird pep in his step, it was different from his usual shuffle he presented you with. Was this just something else he'd hidden from you? 

He told you to sit on a bench and wait for him while he talked to some guy who was walking a dog. They seemed to be friendly even laughing quite loudly as they departed with pats on the back as if they'd agreed upon something. 

_ “This'll get him back out again.”  _

_ “What?” _

He didn't answer you, all he did was wrap an arm around you and walked you both home. Elliot didn't remember it the next day, you heard him confronting someone in his room, some kind of deranged laughing and then he just came out and headed to church group like nothing out of the ordinary had happened. It worried the hell out of you, but you had to let him deal with it himself, you couldn't force care on him. 

 

You and Elliot did see eachother again even after he rejected the job,again and again and again. 

You hadn't really put a label on it yet, sometimes it seemed like friendship, sometimes it seemed like more. He'd always find you at the most opportune times, bumping into you on a day off or sending you a text to meet for lunch just as your hour break started, it was like he was fine tuned to your schedule. 

Little did you know that was because he had hacked you, but that was an issue you'd already confronted and resolved. 

This was different though, this time had been more intimate than any other interaction you two had had. This was your first time in his apartment, the lights were low and you both were just laying in his bed. 

You weren't doing anything in particular, he'd sneak a kiss every once in awhile but you were mostly just laying there enjoying eachothers company. But then he started getting antsy, he shot up from his spot on the bed and just looked startled. He was sweating and you were afraid he was having a panic attack. 

_ “Ellie what's wrong?”  _

_ “You need to go.”  _

You were confused, maybe he was self conscious about you seeing him like this so early in your implied relationship, you tried to reassure him but it just seemed to make things worse. When you touched him was when you knew you'd stepped into grim territory. 

The gist of what happened is he basically had a breakdown in front of you and got so embarrassed he kicked you out and you didn't see him for almost two weeks. 

It was only through trial and error that you'd learned to navigate the maze that was your lovers mental health, and this was a time that he needed to dig himself out of the hole he was buried in. 

 

It was your day off so you were permitted to join in on Elliot's daily routine. 

He basically ate most of his meals with Leon, he was a very talkative man you usually found yourself engaging with if you were home early enough to catch Elliot and join the two for dinner. 

He was nice, you were glad Elliot had made a friend in this next stage of his life. Seeing him with no computer or tech to be seen of minus his mother's house phone just looked so wrong, but it was what he decided so you respected it. Leon was digging into the morals of some television characters as you finished your meal and you all walked to the basketball court. 

You didn't really like sports, but neither did Elliot but here he was watching the amateur game anyway. Your eyes scanned the other onlookers and you caught the minuscule interaction between Elliot and a girl who'd lit something on fire. 

You felt jealousy prick at you as he smiled at her, you would definitely be having a talk about that later. 

 

You hadn't labeled your relationship but you were regretting it now, he told you about Shayla and how they'd went to a dinner party together as a couple. It hurt you, you didn't think it would but it really did. Your small crush had turned into the ebbings of a passionate love but here he was smoldering the flames and eating his sandwich so casually like he hadn't just stomped on your heart in this fucking restaurant. 

_ “So she's your girlfriend?” _

_ “Well yeah, I asked her, isn't that what you're supposed to do?”  _

_ “You're not supposed to, you should want to.”  _

He seemed puzzled by the notion, you knew Elliot had trouble navigating emotions and social cues, but your logic was mostly out the window in your bitterness. 

_ “I just wanted to do something normal for once.”  _

_ “Well you're not normal Elliot.”  _

This noticeably stung him coming from you, you felt guilt for hurting him but flushed it out as you stood leaving money for your food 

_ “I need to get back to work.”  _

_ “(Y/N) I don't-”  _

You were already halfway to the door, he didn't stop you. 

You threw yourself into work immediately, you got so ahead Tyrell actually sent you home early. 

_ “I'm fine Mr. Wellick.”  _

_ “You've basically schedule the next two months of my work and reorganized that filing cabinet six times, go home (L/n), I don't wanna see you again until 8 am.”  _

He really had been a nice boss, you later wished he hadn't gone more off the rails than usual. 

You sulked in self pity for that night and that night only, you convinced yourself you were completely over it in the morning and look as professional as possible. 

It really worked for a few weeks, Elliot choosing another was completely swept over as you gained more work projects than usual to complete and you definitely didn't cry when you got home several times. Everything was running smoothly until that night. 

Technically it was early morning, about 3 am, you were fast asleep but startled awake by rapid banging on your door. 

Fear gripped you as you inched towards the door, you looked through the peephole to see a familiar black hoodie. 

_ “Go away Alderson.”  _

_ “(Y/N), please.” _

You tried to stay passive, but hearing the crack in his voice scared you, you quickly unlocked your door and let him in. His eyes were puffy and red with tears. 

He didn't say much, just that Shayla was gone, at first you thought he meant broke up be he really meant  _ gone.  _

You never met her, maybe she had been ill. You didn't know what caused her to pass, but you felt yourself quietly promise her as he laid in your bed, passed out from crying. 

“ _ I'll take good care of him.”  _

 

Elliot's mother had given you a grocery list, saying you should be more useful and run errands. Elliot decided to stray from his routine to come with you seeing as you'd have to walk home with all these bags. It felt relaxing to do something so normal with him again, it felt like you were brushing at the feeling of your old lives. Elliot basically never had anything in his fridge  other than old as time vegetables in the bottom drawer and some less than fresh milk so grocery shopping had become another hang out for you two. 

You were checking the firmness of an avocado when you saw Elliot picking at the gauze around his head. There was no injury you knew, his mother hadn't even questioned it when he started wearing it, but then again she didn't care much about what he did as long as he followed her rules. 

You knew how she treated Elliot as a child, you questioned him your first night back how he could come back here, but he convinced you it was what he needed. So you grit your teeth, you’d been doing that a lot lately for him. You felt your heart soften as he reached to hold your free hand, his crying fits had come back and he was lonelier than ever, being separated for so long had done a number on him. This is what you did for the ones you love, you let them take their time to heal so they can come back to you. 

You sighed and squeezed his hand.

“I'm here El.” 

He didn't say anything, but you knew it gave him comfort from whatever was going on in his mind. 

  
  


Elliot held you as he slept, Flipper at your feet on her back pushing out little dog snores, this was bliss right here. It definitely had not started perfect, it was work getting to know Elliot since he didn't want to be known, but you were slowly but surely getting better at it. He was opening up more, a little more willing to touch than usual but only at home. 

You smiled to yourself nuzzling into his chest ‘home’, this was home. It felt so good just thinking it. 

He'd finally made it official a few weeks back asking you to be his, you'd already gotten quite domestic but him affirming it made it even better. 

_ “(Y/n), do you want to be together?”  _

_ “What? Like dating? Elliot it's okay you don't have to ask me that just beca-”  _

_ “I know I don't have to, I want to.” _

He'd actually taken your words to heart and took the time to really mull over his feelings for you, you grabbed his face and littered it with kisses saying yes, he was obviously taken aback by the action but leaned in anyway a small smile on his lips. 

But even with this new closeness, Elliot could just get so lonely, sometimes you'd come over to just check in and he'd be in the space between his dresser and the wall sobbing and holding himself. 

You tried your best to help him, he'd always hold onto you, like you tethered him down. You were his comfort. 

 

You had your own demons, you were sent home from your desk job, you'd accidentally burned your hand with coffee, you were triggered back to what had happened a few nights after the hack. Your hand was an angry red and the flesh was tender as you wrapped it with gauze, the cooling salve you rubbed on smelled like gross minty medicine but it did help. You were trying to push back the feelings and the flashbacks, Elliot wasn't home, the only comfort you could find was laying in his sheets. You closed your eyes and pressed your face into his pillow, maybe if you focused really hard you could imagine you were actually holding him and you were home. 

You remembered Tyrell basically begging you to help him, you'd cleaned out your apartment which was pretty scarce minus your furniture since most of your stuff was now at Elliot's. You didn't remember much, you had helped him but then you were basically stranded with him seeing as you had no money as he did whatever he was doing. He was in hiding, he was a murderer, and here you were aiding him in his time of need like the good little assistant you were. You didn't really want to but he was so persuasive, he made you feel obligated from all the opportunities he'd given you over the years.

You had at least written Elliot so he'd know you were okay and you loved him. You missed him so much during that time, but eventually Tyrell disappeared even from you, he went truly off the grid which left you the freedom to head home.

It was heart breaking to realize Elliot had left, but to where was a mystery to you, you only knew one other person in his circle, you prayed she hadn't changed her number. 

Darlene seemed a bit distant even if she insisted she was glad to see you, she was at some kind of unofficial club meeting. She knew where Elliot was only because she was the last person he spoke to before moving, she gave you the number and that was how you ended up in the now. 

You felt tears pricking your eyes as you began to quietly cry, you missed your life before this. Quiet mornings where Elliot actually took the time to look at you instead of acting like he was running some program like a goddamn robot. You missed Flipper and Qwerty, falling asleep to the sound of typing, the musky scent that filled up the whole apartment and your late night walks. Your chest ached painfully as you finally let it all out, you hiccuped as someone curled into the small bed with you. You knew it was Elliot, you placed your palm against the front of his hoodie as he pulled you close. 

“I'm sorry.” 

You looked up at him, eyes red

“For what?” 

He lifted your hand, but you knew what it was really for

“I'm sorry I can't fix it.” 

You sniffled and smiled 

“It's okay, It's more important that you're here for me while it heals than fixing it.” 

He understood that this extended to both of you, you were in it for the long haul even if he was going to live the same day on repeat until he was back in full control. 

He leaned down and kissed you, it was long and sweet, you felt much better as you smiled against his lips. 

With this new life, everything had completely changed and it was hard. But with Elliot here, kissing you and holding you close, living through it and loving him seemed like the easiest thing you could do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i decided to make a second one to have the readers side of the story, idk if there will be more but ill leave it open just in case


	3. Guilt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elliot finds a new way to rid himself of Mr Robot and you begin to get suspicious 
> 
> (S2 ep2 spoilers)

Elliot alderson/ Reader

 

Just like most people would be, you were concerned when your boyfriend came running into the house incoherently mumbling and sweating. You followed him to your shared room where he shut the door on you and proceeded to force himself to throw up on the floor. Definitely had to wash his jacket after that one. 

He’d been talking to someone again, you assumed it was Mr robot, he was the only recurring apparition according to Elliot. But that wasn't the only thing that was different, he'd come home even later than usual the other day and this only peaked your suspicions further. 

 

You didn't know what the hell he was on this time.

You hadn't wanted to blame this on drugs but Elliot had been acting completely ecstatic with the world the past few days,scarily so, some would think this was a good thing, but you knew better. 

When you'd first met it had been morphine, he eventually went cold turkey, he  hadn't really been on anything serious since then that you knew of but here you were. Nobody really seemed to notice that it was an issue to begin with, but most people didn't know Elliot that well around here so you couldn't blame them for just taking it as an improvement in his mood. 

He was jumpy and just glad to be around anyone and anything as the next few days went on, he was chattering and smiling. His smile was so cute to see but this was wrong, you'd tried to go through his things after you noticed it but you found nothing. Maybe you were just being paranoid, maybe he was happy for once and wanted to express it outwardly. 

Oh god was he playing basketball?

 

You assumed he'd went to bed after you, but you woke in the night just to see him in a low light examining something. He began swallowing some of whatever he was holding, you realized he’d probably hid it on his person as to not confirm your assumptions, smart boy. 

“Ell?” 

He wasn't responding, he was wrapped up in his inner monologue again, he just kept fidgeting like you weren't even there.

_ ‘Do I intervene or do I have to let him solve this for himself?’ _

It has become so hard to tell, Elliot sometimes begged for the solace of your arms and support, other times he pushed you away so far sometimes you thought he'd never come back. 

You decided he would probably end up dissociating again if you tried to mess with him right now, you'd confront him about it after you got home from work tomorrow, you'd just have to trust he'd hang on for another day as his highs died down as he built up a tolerance to the drug. 

 

You didn't see him until later that night as you were washing up after your meal, he was quiet as he lingered, watching you clean off the dishes you had used. It was obvious he wanted to talk to you about something but he was having a hard time trying to bring it up. He’d speak in time, you’d learned to have patience in this relationship. Elliot as previously established, wasn't one to open up if pried at. 

You were getting ready for bed when he finally spoke 

“I don't know what to do anymore..”

His tears fell against his sheets, you crawled into the small bed with him, holding him close as his guilt consumed him. You knew Gideon's death had to have affected him in some way, he was a good man, you could tell from meeting him the few times you had. It wasn't just that, he was crumbling with the weight of the weeks events. The inevitable return of Mr Robot was what really got him, you didn't say anything because you knew he didn't want you to, he just needed someone who wasn't imaginary to listen to him for once and not think he's crazy.

 

He eventually cried himself out and just snuggled into you, apologies and thank you's blended together as he began to drift, you kissed his forehead in response. 

Sometimes you wish you could save him from all of this, be his hero and clear away all the problems that plagued him, no more Mr robot or fsociety, just you and Elliot. But that was childish, he had to face the consequences of what he had done whether you liked it or not. 

You could not save him from himself, much less the world that he'd put into ruin in an effort to rebuild it, you weren't a hero, you were just (Y/n). 

But as Elliot slept soundly against your shoulder for what you guessed must have been the first time in days, maybe for now, that's all he needed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this ones shorter, wrote it a little bit after the episode ended


	4. Truth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Elliot's delusional, you know the truth

Elliot Alderson/ Reader  
  


Your boyfriend had been in prison for three months. 

 

You weren’t home the night of his arrest, you were too busy helping your boss act out the beginnings of the plan they had both formulated. There was so much tied to this and you were involved, all for the man you loved.

There was a lot of risk, you had to lay low, you had quit your comfortable job at E corp after Tyrell “disappeared” and moved to a crummy desk job you were over qualified for in a lower part of town, you had become a nobody in hopes of throwing off any trail you may be leaving in all of this. 

 

You held down the fort while Elliot was gone, you’d fully moved in, trying to keep the place homely for when his sentence was up, you did a lot for him you knew, more than most people would do for anyone, but you sometimes think that's why Elliot chose to let you take a whack at pulling down his walls. You couldn’t say you fully knew him, but from what you've seen, you know him as well as someone can know Elliot Alderson. 

Your life became grey and lonely without him, it made you wonder who you were before you tied yourself to the druggy yet brilliant hacker who you called your boyfriend. His therapist had been in contact with you, his delusions were persisting, and from what he had been telling her it had progressed from just him living in his mother's house, you had now joined the jolly bunch in his mind made escape. 

You visited him as much as you could, it was hard having to nod and smile and go along with his delusions, yes you had been looking for an apartment, really? Leon said that at lunch? Yes doing errands together was nice, you liked going out together. It broke your heart to see him like that but you understood, this fantasy was like a security blanket, unbreakable routine put him in control according to him, it kept Mr. Robot at bay. 

 

You wished he was home that night, spending all your time creating your own routine in the empty shell you two once called home, it was losing his smell and it brought tears to your eyes. 

You’d spent so much time working on phase two,Tyrell was emotional and erratic about the whole thing, he thought he and Elliot would be gods together, and what would that make you? 

You were meant to gain nothing from this, just a footmen doing their job, doing as asked by the boss you’d been loyal to for years, and the man you’d pledged your heart to. 

Most would see this as empty, you received nothing as these two burned the earth alive with computers and codes. 

But you did get something, Elliot. 

Your Elliot. 

Tyrell could pine all he wanted, you weren't blind like your Ellie, you could tell the man was absolutely obsessed with him and the idea of gaining unlimited power together. 

But at the end of the day, he was yours, even if he was delusional and a little hard to deal with at times, he told you he was yours as long as you’d have him, baggage and all you would. 

 

He was out of prison now, you’d heard from Darlene that she had picked him up, you stayed home, you weren't sure why but something told you you had to stay put. All this time spent waiting and working you should be out there with him, holding his hand, talking again, kissing his face off for all you cared it had been a long 3 months apart.

You were laying on the couch when he came in with some man in a suit, he had all this tech with him and set to work putting it all together without acknowledging you. 

Your heart swelled but you remained silent, the man spoke and Elliot worked, all you could do was sit on the couch and watch. You knew what it was like when he was in a zone, he had something he had to do, and nothing would stop him until he decided to let something in that could. 

The man tried to be more casual and began just talking about whatever, but you and Elliot tuned him out, he became a white noise to you both. 

You already knew you didn't have his full attention, he was likely telling his backseat passenger as you called them about whatever he was contemplating. 

 

“I'm glad you're home..” You whispered

 

He stared for a moment before quirking his lip in an almost smile 

 

“Me too.” 

 

He’d left as quickly as he came, you got a chaste kiss and a promise of later, by the next time you’d heard anything it was from Angela, Elliot had tried to stop Phase 2, so Tyrell had shot him. 

You wanted to be angry, but you knew Elliot or Mr. Robot or whoever the hell had prepared for this, he did this to himself to complete his plan. He wasn’t dead, at least you hoped he wasn’t they wouldn't let that happen, he was the key to this after all. 

You put on your coat and grabbed your keys, you needed to speak with the others. 

You closed the door with a quiet click. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Season two ended not even and hour ago and here i am with this super short thing, sorry there's not so much interaction but it just didn't feel right to put too much

**Author's Note:**

> i love this show and cant wait to see what goes on in season 2! hope this one shot was okay for a first attempt at writing for Elliot! Enjoy


End file.
